Summer plans!

Busy day today. :) Let's start with the more exciting news.

I try to go to Finland to see my family and old friends at least once a year. And in six weeks I'm flying off to this wonderful country again. I'm really excited about it, it's been so long since I've seen everyone. What makes it even better is that we are also having a big family reunion while I'm over there.

It does also put pressure on me. My mum has always been very quick to notice change in me weight wise. It always kills me a bit if she says that I've gained weight when I go over. In a way I feel like I've let her down somehow. I mean she will always worry about my health, especially since my back is what it is. I'm sure she will be surprised in a positive way this time, though. Last time she saw me was when she was over here last Christmas, just before I started losing weight. Since then I've dropped 6kg and toned up by loads.

Going home gives me a fantastic opportunity to work out though. There's a lake literally next to my childhood home and the walking options are limitless. I really can't wait. Just hoping that my other half gets the chance to take time off work so he could join me.

I popped into town to hand in some CVs to some shops in the hopes of getting a job for the summer before my op. Fingers crossed I get something, would be really nice to have some spare money.. I did also get some hair colour (again). I'm just fed up with having to recolour my hair every two weeks when I keep it red so it's bye bye red again. Back to brunette it is. It actually looks really nice, the washed out red is kinda coming through the brown so it looks quite different.

I'm so hooked to this Garnier Olia hair colour. It just smells so amazing, completely different to what I've used before. The smell is pretty much the only reason I buy it.

Oh and to finish this post on a high, my legs are finally pain free! No knee ache, no sore ankles. Hoorah!

So I'm a thug now

At least felt like it!! As it was raining for most of the day today I thought that it's best to wear my Doc Martin boots so I keep my toes warm and dry (and I also didn't want to ruin my suede boots). That combined with a biker jacket and my Skullcandy headphones I got really bad looks from all the old people in town! It's just incredible how people look at you so differently based on what you wear. I usually get the happy smiles from everyone so I felt so lost today! :D

I mean sure, in a way I understand it. It's not exactly a style that is associated with.. nice people. I try to dress pretty neutral most of the time, I just don't like being put into a category when I'm out and about. I don't want people to base their opinion about me on what I wear. But then again, people who judge me based on my appearance clearly are not worth getting to know.

One upside to these boots, however. Thanks to the steelcaps, they weigh a massive 1.5kg each, making walking in them a wonderful workout. I've had these boots for longer than I can remember, I must've been 15 or so when I got these. By far the most expensive pair of shoes I've bought but in this case it really shows that I've paid for quality. They are 100% cow's leather, they are nice and warm and waterproof. Or well, they used to be until I actually wore them enough for the leather to start cracking! They're still wonderful though as long as I don't step into deep puddles.

And to keep this post somewhat fitness related, I thought that it's a good time to post about my sources of inspiration again. :) There's two bloggers who just simply make me push myself harder every single day. Heidi and Monna are just incredibly fabulous, they just show how girls can kick ass just as much as the guys when it comes to fitness! ;) If I ever create a shrine (well ok not in a literal sense, like an inspiration board kind of thing) to all the people I get my inspiration from, both Heidi and Monna will be there, I wouldn't even have to think twice. Monna has this amazing aura of happiness and positivity around her and her blog posts are just such a joy to read, while Heidi has a more kickass and no nonsense attitude to fitness. :) I'd love to pick their brain one day.

And just to make it clear, I do not own the rights to these pictures. They belong to Monna and Heidi. :)

And sorry to everyone who reads my blog and doesn't speak Finnish as the girls write their blog in that weird and wonderful language. But you can always look at the pretty pictures! :D

WI 21: +1kg

Completely what I expected after another long weekend away and no exercise. On the plus side, my ankles are finally starting to feel fine. I wanted to leave exercise for a while after the pain started vanishing just in case so I didn't stress the tendons again, and right now it's starting to look very good. I might try cycling today and see how it goes.

Recovered, just about

Long weekend and a lot of other commitments have meant that my dear blog hasn't been getting the attention it deservers. Back to it now, though!

So, let's talk about Holland! Incredibly amazing weekend, I don't get to see these people too often so I made sure to make the most of it. We mainly stayed in a town called Amersfoort where my friend lives and also did a day trip up to Amsterdam. Lots of good food, drinks and brilliant company. We also made some initial plans for my birthday in October. :)

Thankfully my ankles decided to start healing up over the weekend as well. My right ankle is still a bit sore at times but the left one has been fine since Sunday. Hooray! I did feel a bit funny having to use flats all weekend but it really paid off, I'd take flats over painful ankles any day. So this'll also mean that I'll be able to get back to working out properly!

And speaking of getting back to working out, I'll probably start going to the gym soonish (when I can afford it that is). A very dear friend of mine has moved to Bognor so I'll have him as company when I fancy going to the gym. ^^

And just to give you guys a quick update on my back! I got the MRI results back yesterday and the next step is to get something called an injection test done. Simply put the disc above the slipped vertebra is damaged and the surgeon wants to have a better look at it to know what to do with the fusion. Obviously the disc under the slip is absolutely mauled after years of constant pressure, but if the upper one is left as it is it'll only start causing problems in a few years.

I've still got a few weeks to go to the test but the nerves are definitely kicking in now. It's all getting very real.

WI 20: -0.2kg + progress check

I decided against waiting over the weekend for my progress check. This month has been a slow one as it is with the London weekend and two weeks off exercise because of my ankle, I think I'd cry if this check was bad! :D

And as always, measurement in brackets from last check a month ago.

Weight: 78,1kg (79,2kg)
Arms: 33,5cm (33cm)
Bust: 102cm (102cm)
Waist: 75cm (76cm)
Belly: 95cm (96cm)
Thighs: 60,5cm (60,5cm)

And for the first time ever, progress pictures in the same post with the measurements! :D It definitely shows that it's been a slow month. Oh well, still going in the right direction. :)

Last minute shopping

So with my ankle being what it is I had to replan my wardrobe for this weekend. I don't really have any fancy flats for going out so while I was out today I got some new clothes and a pair of shoes! Good excuse to go shopping. I've also been looking for jeans for absolutely forever now and finally found a nice pair that feels amazing and doesn't look awful on me. And because I was attracted by bright colours, I grabbed a nice top as well.

I've ALWAYS hated shopping for jeans. Especially with the current trend of incredibly skinny jeans that can only fit rice sticks in them. I've always had curves and I'm short, so skinny jeans have always looked incredibly hideous on me. I prefer balancing my bum and thighs out with bootcut jeans. It just looks so much better. I don't think I'm even going to start buying skinny jeans when I lose more weight. Just not my style at all.

Oh and on a more serious note, I went to get an application form for uni as well. Or well, uni level course that my old college organises. Fingers crossed I get in. :)

Medical stuff

Right, let's start with the more important topic of the day. MRI scan! It went well, took about 10-15 minutes in total. The machine is so funny. When it's not "on" it kinda makes this train like sound. When it's taking the images, it's like being thrown into the middle of a full blown rave. Once again the staff was incredible! I love going to a private hospital, you just get a completely different feel to everything. The hospital doesn't have it's own MRI unit so instead I was escorted to this mobile unit that was parked up in front of the hospital. It was so cool. :D

I also spoke to my mother in law (she's a nurse) about my ankle this morning. Told her that it's been hurting for nearly one and a half weeks now and isn't getting any better so she had a look at it and said I've simply overdone it with exercise and damaged the tendons. She wrapped my ankle in a proper dressing and suggested me to take anti-inflammatory painkillers and use this ibuprofen gel we've got. And you know what? My ankle feels a million times better now. I'm hoping that the painkillers / gel and rest will make this pain in the ass injury heal up quick. I'm dying to get back to working out.

Dog show day

Yesterday was so busy! I wanted to post all day but just couldn't find the time for it. We went to a dog show yesterday, my mother in law entered her dog in two rings and the rest of us just went for fun and I went to take pictures. I've always loved animal photography so opportunities like this are amazing and I usually grab them with both hands.

And as a sidenote, I have opened a photography blog! You are more than welcome to have a look, I have posted yesterday's dog pics on there already.

After the dog show we ended up having dinner at Pizza Hut. As bad as it sounds, I was quite good! Lots of salad to fill me up before the food arrived, one glass of diet coke, a salmon pasta bake with spinach and a dessert. Couldn't resist ordering one of their cookie dough desserts, they're just too good. And it was a special occasion so wanted to treat myself a bit.

My ankle wasn't as bad as I thought it would be either! We did a fair bit of walking during the day and apart from a few twitches here and there it wasn't too uncomfortable for me. Hoping that I'm on the way to recovery now, I just simply won't even have time to go to the doctors today!

Why no time? I'm going job hunting today. I managed to miss my alarm completely so only going after lunch, kinda annoyed at myself for that but what can you do. Also going to visit my old college to get an application form for a university level graphics design course. I want to study more and specialise in something. All I've done is a college course in creative media, and that's not gonna get me anywhere.

Busy day incoming!

WI 19: -1.4kg

Well. Not quite what I was expecting this week! :D I haven't exercised at all because of my ankle, I've only done the squat challenge four times over the week. It just really shows how important your diet is when losing weight. :) And I'm sure intermittent fasting has got something to do with it as well.

Next week is going to be a bit iffy again, my other half booked me a last minute weekend trip to Netherlands to celebrate my friend's birthday. In a way it's a good thing, my friend LOVES dancing so might burn some of that booze on the dance floor... :D I think I'll be quite ok in all fairness, with my monthly progress check being on Sunday / Monday. 

I ♥ pancakes

Let's start with yesterday's stuff before going into all this pancake business. You can probably guess that the ankle's not getting any better. I even tried wrapping some wound dressing around it to give it some support but even that did absolutely sod all. My other half was so kind and even massaged it last night but nothing seems to help. Off to doctors on Monday it seems.

Because I was feeling sorry for myself I wanted to make burgers for dinner. As in, making the bread and patties myself. I probably would've even made the chips if I wasn't feeling so lazy. :D I absolutely love cooking and trying new things so did a little experiment with the burger patties. Using a bit of rosemary made it all taste so much better, they were probably the best burgers I've made so far. It's amazing how one small change just transforms the entire dish. Yummy.

Ok, done talking about last night now! I've had a mad craving for pancakes all week but we ran out of eggs like the day before so I've had to suffer with my craving until today! I asked my other half to take me to the shop around the corner just to get eggs, blueberries and a lemon (I like my pancakes with blueberries, he has his with lemon and sugar). I always use the same recipe, it's the basic Finnish style pancake. Or well, they're more crêpes because they're thin. Anyways! I decided to puré the blueberries to get a nice gooey sauce this time, added a little sweetener and a splash of vanilla extract. Craving 0 - 1 Panda.

Oh and every time I use the lounge mirror to take pictures now I just keep having the phrase "cute as a button" in my head. I mean how many people honestly need to stand on coffee tables to be at the same level with the mirror..? :D

Back surgery incoming

Today was the most exciting day in my life for a long time. I had an appointment with a back surgeon! We had a quick chat about my options and he said that he is very keen on operating on my back so I decided that it's what I'm going for. My back is just limiting my life so much right now. I'm out of work, 75% of housework is out of the question (can't lift heavy things and can't bend over so can't wash floors / hoover), I can't stand up for long periods of time.. I'm having an MRI scan done next week to see if the damage in my spine is limited to my lower back or if I've got more wonky bits somewhere else. I'm kinda hoping that it's just my lower spine, though.

I felt really comfortable at the hospital as well, which was such a nice surprise. The hospital is an old school so you don't really get the awful clinical feeling when you walk in. The surgeon was lovely and the nursing staff incredibly helpful and friendly. I was greeted by an east European nurse and to my surprise actually pronounced my last name right! Hoorah! :D

I'm quite positive about all this. The surgeon said that it's possible to get all the scans, tests and the actual operation done by the end of the year. Three month recovery after that and I should be able to get back into living my life properly. I really can't wait.

Rest day ramble

I swear I'm going insane soon if this ankle doesn't start healing. I have a strong feeling it's just a strained tendon as I can really feel the pain in a specific spot now when I move my ankle. It's just frustrating. It was such a beautiful day today and I've been stuck indoors. There's no way I can completely rest my ankle either as I do kinda need to walk during the day. Argh.

But I've suffered today!! In two ways actually, one pleasant and one not so pleasant thing haha! Our Schnauzer puppy decided to be a cat today and wanted to climb on my shoulder when I was holding her so I have mad scratches all over my chest now. And to the more pleasant suffering - squat challenge! Today's goal was 60, which wasn't too bad when I split it into two sets of 30 reps.

Other than that, it's been quite a slacky day. Just talking to a friend, playing games and chilling. Also entertained myself by putting makeup on and taking some pictures. :D Such a tart but oh well. And just because, a picture of my daily fluid intake. Coffee (with sweetener, no milk) and water is the only thing I drink during the day. No point drinking my calories.

Ankle issues

My ankle just isn't getting any better. I've had two complete rest days this week and it still hurts when I walk. It's so random as well, at times it feels like nothing's wrong and then all of a sudden it starts hurting. It also makes a lot of crunching noises when I turn it. I can't see anything on the outside, but there's definitely something under my skin that's just not right. It annoys me so much because I want to work out. I feel like I'm going to explode because of all this energy soon.

Bad ankle, bad. :(

On a more happy note, I've started ordering Graze boxes again. I ordered them for a while about two years ago, then when I stopped my mother in law decided to carry on getting them. You can pick between a Nibblebox and a Nutritionbox. Nibblebox gives wider variety of snacks, Nutritionbox is only the healthiest options from their selection. As I'm not too bothered, I go for the Nibblebox. These snacks are just absolutely delicious. I get four small snack boxes once a week, this week's selection included vanilla pumpkin & sunflower seeds, smoky gazpacho dip with wholemeal croutons, summer berry flapjacks and dark rocky road (dark chocolate buttons, cranberries and pecan nuts). Out of the four I've already had the seeds and croutons, I'm trying to save the other two for after dinner over the week. I can't wait to dig into the flapjacks.

Just to keep myself going, I've started a 30 day squat challenge. Someone shared this picture on a forum I use and thought that I want to give it a go. I started it yesterday, so today my goal is 55 squats. Yesterday I split the 50 into two sets of 25 so I didn't kill my legs straight away, I will probably go for 30 / 25 today. I can't wait to get to 250. :D

Just flexing, sup? :3

Progress pics again, yay! I've been able to see some definition in my arms for quite a while now but it hasn't really been visible enough for pictures until now. I am madly proud of myself for achieving this much in such a short time. I can only imagine what my muscles will be like in a few more months. Unfortunately I don't have any pictures of my arms / legs from when I started, but I pretty much started from zero. And this is what it all looks like now.

I still have that little bit of fat right by my armpits. I have a feeling that it'll stick around for quite a while, there's still quite a bit of fat there. I mean sure it's shrunk by tons since I started but it just seems to be a very slow process. It's the same with my inner thighs, there's just that spare tyre still hanging about.

And oh my god my calves are starting to be so massive. I've never really been able to wear boots because of fat calves, but now I have no hope in hell haha! The contrast between my ankles and calves is insane. :D

WI 18: +0.5kg

It's been an odd week. With last weekend still haunting me, I've been eating a bit more than usual. Nothing major though, a biscuit here and there and so on. Just need to get back to it properly again.

WI 17 (last week, when I wasn't home) was in similar figures if I remember correctly.

Dat coffee table

Time for some progress pictures again. Been a while. I'm taking advantage of our coffee table again, as I found it highly useful last night. :D As the "before" pictures I've used the ones I took 5th March. My spinal condition is highly obvious in the side picture, you can just see my back being madly arched and my stomach looking a bit odd as a result.

I love how small my thighs are starting to look. Also quite happy with how round (and small) my bum is compared to two months ago! All those squats and lunges are finally paying off. :) There's also a bit right under my arms that has gone, that spare tyre in my upper back. Yay!

Anyways, workout was a bit tedious with my ankle. I went for a walk in the afternoon and my ankle was fine, but it just started being so sore again when I was putting more stress on it. Even moving my foot now makes my ankle ache. Sigh. I still have no idea how I managed to hurt it.

Food wise today has definitely been.. odd. Lunch was close to non existent, I saw a small bowl of rice in the fridge and decided to throw a bit of tuna in there, stick it in the microwave for a bit and top it all with a few spoonfuls of cottage cheese, some beetroot and ketchup. It was really good but didn't really fill me up, was just too lazy to make anything. I did make up for it all at dinner though! I love bolognese and we had this new jar of pasta sauce (tomato & chilli Loyd Grossman) so wanted to give it a go. I always use a jar of readymade sauce and top it up with a tin of chopped tomatoes to give it a bit more sauce (the jars are way too small for 500g of beef). Also to be a bit fancy, red peppers! Yummy.